punch buggy

The fiancee has a strange habit. Everytime she sees a VW Beetle she will yell "Punch Buggy No Returns" and hit me in the arm. It is annoying and dangerous, especially when I am driving. But I must admit it can be quite fun when I am winning.

Recently I realised another friend has to suffer the same indignities from his girlfriend. I realised it is not some figment of the fiancee's childhood, so I looked it up and...

[Wikiepedia] Punch buggy (also called punch bug, slug bug,[1] or punch beetle[2]) is a car game generally played by young children in which participants hit each other upon sight of a Volkswagen Beetle.

There is even a website for Punch Buggy Rules and Regulations. Here is an excerpt:

RULE 2: Calling a punch properly. To call a punch, you hit 'em, say Punch Buggy, the color of the 'bug' and no returns. (NOTE: You have to specify an 'old' bug, but not a new bug. You also have to state if it's a convertible, but not a Hard top. You can also say 'Rag-top' instead of convertible.)

So let's say a red convertible passes, you'd yell: "Punch buggy, red convertible, no returns. If ya call the wrong color, not state it's a convertible or not specify no returns, prepare to get smacked back. If it's an old convertible bug you'd say:" old
Punch buggy, red convertible, no returns.

Yeah, it's a bit of a mouthful, but it's worth three hits.

If three of you are in the car, YOU only need to call it once and you can hit 'em both. Of the two remaining people, one has gotta call a proper punch next to hit the last. You obviously then you can't be hit by by either guy for calling Punch Buggy. If there's a fourth guy then tough luck. If ya didn't hit him when you called a hit, then he's free to hit you. See Rule 3

So if you're in the car with her, beware. You never know when you're going to get hit.

that infernal cat

That infernal cat is everywhere. In restaurants, taxis, petrol kiosks and even bubble tea stalls. Brilliantly obiang in gleaming gold accented by cheap red paint, he confronts you with a quizzical expression, and all the while that infernal paw swings back and forth, back and forth. Like someone bouncing a ball against the wall, in an eternal display of monotony to lull you into mind-numbing hypnosis.

Enough is enough. Take your stand today. Still the infernal paw, that eyesore of the visual senses. Let not one more quiver issue from the feline abominations.

This infernal paw has been stilled

PS: In yet another aberration of nature, the paw must be completely still else it will increase the trajectory of its paw back to the original amplitude of its own accord. It totally violates the conservation of momentum. I say the beasties are possessed.

badonkadonk

There are two birthdays coming up in the next few months: the middle sister and the fiance. And a great gift suggestion from the baby sister. Well, she didn't exactly propose it as a gift idea, but it is so timely the implication is obvious.
"So what on earth is that," you may ask, obviously never having seen one of these beauties before. The answer, as clearly stated on Amazon.com, is that this is a Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank, retailing for US$19,999.95, and there are only two left in stock. Better grab yours now.

The applications and advantages of this baby are obvious, especially with regards to my dearest sister. A cursory glance through the 151 raving reviews posted by users shows how this could really benefit a new driver:

Considering the driving habits of the locals in my area, I decided that trading in my sedan was probably a good idea, in fact, something that would improve my health more than eating broccoli and drinking green tea. For one thing, there is little armor on my riceburner, and one local past-time here is for SUV drivers to trundle aimlessly through stop signs while clamping their cellphones tightly to their ears, probably to avoid hearing my horn blaring and some choice swears, too. One woman in a silver SUV seems to have a fatwa against me or else a death-wish--she's run the stop sign right by my house twice while I was in the intersection and once it was on a very rainy day and she had her kids in the car. Rather than call child protective services or the police, I decided to drive more defensively. Now I cross intersections with confidence, knowing SUV's, women ignoring the road while yapping into their cell phones, possums and even Hummer limousines are hapless against the front prow of my Badonkadonk. The cow catcher design is not only aerodynamic, it is quite effective at lifting stray cattle right out of the way.

Now the only question is, how much would the COE cost?

game control blog

Game Control has started their own blog to archive The Casino Royale Game experience. So to support the excellent work they did with the game, we will be contributing our thoughts and feelings about some of the clues, and how we solved them. See here for updates ...

Clue #1
Clue #2
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Meta Clue

casino royale game in retrospect

After almost 20 hours of non-stop action, I'm back, had a nap, and ready to write about The Casino Royale Game. Many people are already asking how it went, so the best way to let everyone know is to put it down here. To cut a long story short, we had a lot of fun, got to know each other better, and somehow we even managed to win.

It's not that we didn't want to win. But you can't enter a competition with the stated aim of just taking part - you have to set your sights on the goal or the whole thing just falls flat and you will decide to go home halfway through. Still, we really never expected it, because we always thought our stomachs would get in the way. Most of us missed the opening brief because we were scrounging the Esplanade for last minute snacks, and along the way we made numerous pit stops at Carrefour, Kopitiam and Seah Im Food Centre (see complete list of food stops here). We also discovered the delights of a particular brand of roasted seaweed with wasabe. The race is important, but the food even more so! Sadly by the end of it all, we were a little to tired to take advantage of the one-for-one UOB offer at Hog's Breath Cafe as we had originally planned. But enough about food.

Our team comprised Agent R, who's local knowledge of Singapore allowed us to make some great conceptual leaps from half-solved clues; Agent J, specialist in Japanese and pop culture. Agent F, literary genius and sometime barbarian; Agent M, the data cruncher and myself, who helped out here and there by running errands and buying snacks.

The format of The Game was fairly simple. There was a total of 15 RV points, and at each location a new clue to lead us to the next place. The clues were quite diverse, such as number puzzles, patterns hidden in classified ads, an X-ray, Japanese drama serials and my personal favorite was an interactive software puzzle. You can tell from the website that the organisers are quite techie, but the software puzzle took the cake. Time to solve each puzzle ranged from 15 minutes without hints to 3 hours with a lot of hints. I can't put the snazzy software here, but this was one of my personal favourite clues (that does not require additional information to solve):

The RV points were located all around Singapore, stretching from Sengkang in the North to Changi Airport in the East to Harbourfront in the South and Kent Ridge Park in the West. We covered the distances on a whirlwind journey in our souped up Subaru Forester (which had no fear of cars, pickups or even small buses although the people inside were plenty scared at some points) and armed with 5 laptops and an M1 Wireless Broadband Router (our invaluable companion), we carried our little Wi-Fi bubble everywhere that had a power source (unfortunately Kopitiam was not one such place, which explains why we spent 2 hours there eating and not getting much solving done).

Our position in the game was quite a roller coaster. We started off on a red herring (didn't know we could check with Mission Control at first, oops) but once we discovered the real clue we made short work of it. We zoomed through the first couple of clues until we got totally stumped by some picture cards of Japanese pop stars and a cryptic classified ad. Four frustrated (but gastronomically fulfilling) hours later, we found ourselves at the very bottom of the pack. It was then that we also realised that we could take hints from Mission Control, and became what I termed 'hint whores'. Personally I'd have preferred that everyone just spent more time to puzzle out the clues, but we were't about to handicap ourselves on an ideal if all the other teams were doing it. After that we managed to claw our way back into the first few positions in the real time race, and eventually won because we had suffered much less time penalty from hints compared to other teams.

Apart from eating well, we also tried to make sure we were comfortable. After spending a few hours in the stationary car suffering carbon monoxide poisoning, we opted for more creature comforts wherever possible. In a way, this approach actually backfired because there was a lot less focus and less urgency. (Especially in eating places.) But it certainly made the whole thing much more enjoyable! Here is one of our temporary HQs in the Science Hub, eating prata and listening to the greatest hits music clue:

The conduct of The Casino Royale Game obviously invites comparison to the Singapore Amazing Race, of which I am also a two-time participant. I will always look back fondly on the 2003 race as a great experience, just as I will Casino Royale. Here are some of the key differences in the two formats:

• Casino Royale got car, Amazing Race don't have.
• Casino Royale can confirm the solution with Mission Control before you go to the next checkpoint. Amazing Race you just find your way there (sometimes walking for hours) and hope to find the checkpoint.
• Amazing Race got no hints, Casino Royale can opt to take hints for time penalty. And they are quite generous with confirming if you are on the right track too. (We didn't know this at first, maybe they briefed it while we were eating.)
• Amazing Race got tasks to complete at each checkpoint (such as snow tubing, eating a balut) and the chance to visit some very scenic spots. Casino Royale is all about solving the clues.
• Casino Royale over one night, Amazing Race over two.
• Put all the above together and you can tell the Amazing Race is much more phyically and emotionally draining (and satisfying). But Casino Royale was much more intellectually challenging.

In summary, both have their merits, and I suppose they appeal to different audiences. My own personal ideal would be some balance between the two, with clues and car from Casino Royale (and not so many hints) with more time and some of the better scenary and physical challenges from Amazing Race. But the important thing is, they were both awesome fun!

winterbells

It's not often one finds a game combining the precision of a first-person shoot-em-up with beautiful fantasy artwork akin to Christian Riese Lassen. But such is Winterbells. And in the age of WoW when a new game can take days to master, this one takes only one minute. But it's value as a procrastination tool is not to be underestimated, and it can give many hours of sinful pleasure.

Of course the key to succeeding in a game like this is having the correct equipment. I realised early on that my wireless optical mouse is far from adequate, because occasional blips in the radio signal led to frustrating falls from the heavens. So what is the best tool of the trade?

Logitech Wireless Optical Mouse
As mentioned above, lapses of control led to many bunny deaths, but was this a problem with the wireless or with the optical?

IBM Optical Mouse
Optical mouse manufacturers have long claimed that the precision and sensitivity of the optical mouse far surpasses the originals. No wonder you don't The obvious solution was to try out a non-wireless mouse. But it still has problems!

Logitech Trackball
So I thought maybe the problem lies with the optics, and I dug out the old trackball. Unfortunately, there seems to be some grit in the works, and unlike the old mice where you can open it up and clean out the dirt, the trackball is pretty much closed and doomed to failure.

IBM Pointing Stick
I wouldn't even consider playing this game on a touchpad. But the pointing stick seemed to offer more potential. After all, I've used a pointing stick for years, since it it more convenient than plugging in a mouse and does a much better job than any of the other laptop input devices. Nevertheless, it too suffered from lapses when the bunny freezes in mid air.

Some better, some worse, but none of the peripherals seemed able to handle the control smoothly. Perhaps the problem lies with the programming of the event handlers, which may be clogging up memory or processor power leading to occasional lags. Obviously I can't change the code, but maybe I should get a new gaming machine.

cartoons

Wikipedia is a great way to pass lull time, or just want to be distracted from whatever you are supposed to be working on. And much as I am always accused of not being able to multitask, I was recently quite successful at doing my assigned HBS readings on human resource management, during my computer lab cracking linux and windows passwords and learning various security features, all the while catching up old storylines from my childhood. Here are a couple for anyone else who would like to procrastinate:

• Transformers
• Silverhawks
• G.I. Joe
• Visionaries
• Smurfs
• Care Bears
• M.A.S.K.
• He-Man
• Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
• Bravestarr
  

Some interesting facts I discovered:

1. There are so many Transformers cartoons I haven't watched
   
2. The Silverhawks were space-age Thundercats
   
3. G.I. Joe was meant to be the Barbie doll for boys
   
4. The Smurfs were a spinoff from another French series, "Johan & Pirlouit"
5. Care Bears started life as greeting cards illustrations
   
6. M.A.S.K. was meant to be a hybrid of the successful Transformers and G.I. Joe series
7. He-Man was originally a wandering barbarian before they decided to make him a prince

Somehow they don't make cartoons like they used to.

sincere flattery

This entry is shamelessly stolen from annk because it just cracked me up! Ordinarily I would hyperlink the acknowledgement, but I think your blog is kinda private.

You know you are working in a software firm when the Dell battery recall sparks (pun intended) mailnotes that offer captions to these two photographs sent by one of the guys.

14. Don't bother me, I'm working on a hot new program
13. The downside of outsourcing SW development
12. When managers write software
11. No, I ordered a BUD light
10. Dangers of loading the JDF toolkit on a 256MB laptop
9. "Fire and Forget" job submission workflow is identified as customer dissatisfier
8. I said "Firewall" not "Wall of Fire"
7. EFI launches new laptop-based Firey controller
6. New definition of "killer app"
5. The latest denial of service virus
4. Microsoft launches Vista on schedule
3. New high speed "Wi-Fire" protocol testing
2. Finally, a product demo that's not just smoke and mirrors
1. Dell Bulletin: Combination iPod dock/Fire Extinguisher now available as option!

Let me know if it's ok to link you. But for now, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery!

spice for the road

People sometimes tell me I am a reckless driver. I suppose this is not entirely unexpected since I weave in and out of traffic and have a pretty high tolerance for proximity to other cars. When jamming the brake, I pride myself in bringing the car to a gradual¹ stop right on the tail of the car in front of me. (The reason I do this is to maximise my braking distance, putting less torque on the passenger, and also to give the car behind me more space so he won't hit me.) I also gave the salesman a few heartstopping moments during my test drive while cutting through traffic. But no one really complains. I guess it's partly because people sort of expect this behaviour from someone who drives my type of car, and I'm generally pretty confident on the road.

I think it would be much more interesting if I were to start making little exclamations like "yikes!" or "phew, that was close". Or maybe I should brake a little harder, or scream a little. Or take my hands off the steering wheel and cover my eyes. I'm sure that would make the ride much more entertaining and memorable for my friends.

¹ Note that the definition of gradual is not slow. It means by regular or continuous degrees.

world of salseros

I finished the 5-week Salsa Beginner 1 today, and ostensibly as part of the 'graduation', we were all invited to join in the Attitude Dance Studio social night. After five weeks of hanging out of wannabes who can't really dance (yet), an hour at the part totally opened my eyes to the world of salsa dancing.

Watching the instructors and advanced students dance, I realised why it is called a hot and sexy dance. This had kind of escaped me in beginner class. It is also an immensely social dance, with frequent interchange of partners and lots of casual and spontaneous fun.

One interesting thing I noticed is the role each gender played in the social dynamic there. Girls largely outnumbered the guys, but on average the guys seemed to be much better dancers. I attribute this to the fact that each relies on a very difference source of attraction.

For the guys, the most important thing is to dance well. The good dancers there can dance with anyone they want. And if the girl doesn't know the moves, the guy can still sort of lead her through the simpler ones. But as long as he is better than the girl, he is in control. Beginner dancers like myself would never think of approaching anyone above our level. Because in about 1 minute I'd have used up all the moves I know, and she couldn't teach me anything new.

For the girls, the most important thing is to dress provocatively attractively, and you will definitely be invited onto the dance floor. It doesn't really matter how good you are, because a good dancer can still lead you through the steps.

So the guys need to work really hard to get good, and the few that make it to the top can get any girl they want. For the girls, sometimes becoming too good will just intimidate the guys. So maybe it's more important to focus on the appearance and less on the dance steps.

Hmm... in some perverse way, all that seems to mirror real life.

chess of cards

A friend asked me to join him for a contract bridge competition this weekend. It is tempting, but very daunting, and I thought it best to turn him down. Bridge is probably the most mentally intensive activity I know ... and since I've only done one competition in the last 6 years, the likely outcome is a severe headache. But I really love the game, and I think it's a pity it's so obscure or I could play it more on the recreational level.

Most of my friends still don't know what contract bridge is about. So I thought it would be interesting to describe it a little, and how it differs from what we affectionately call kopitiam bridge. That's the game that most RI, ACS or TCHS boys in my generation grew up playing, when they weren't playing tai ti. It's the game where you make a bid for the trump suite, and between you and your partner (floating or fixed) have to win enough tricks to fulfill the bid. I like it because it is a game that requires teamwork and logic. And in contract bridge, the elements of teamwork and logic are elevated to the highest plane. There is no luck.

Contract bridge is usually played in teams of four, comprising two pairs known as North-South and East-West which describes their seat at the table. The main difference is that in contract bridge, you should always try to bid as high as you think possible. And between two teams, the exact same hand of cards is played twice, such that each team has the chance to play both N-S and E-W. This eliminates luck because even if there is a weaker hand, both teams have to play it. The skill of the players is measured by the disparity in results; the higher you bid the more tricks you have to win and the points you get for winning. Landslide victories (slams) are of no use unless the partnership had the precision and courage to bid to a slam level.

Skill takes two forms in this game. The first is in the bidding. The style of bidding is the same as in kopitiam bridge. But since verbal communication is not allowed, the partners must use their bids to describe their hand as much as possible to their partner. Hence many bidding systems have been developed to encapsulate this information in the most efficient way possible. For example, under the Standard American Yellow Card system, an opening bid always signifies that the bidder has at least 12 points in hand (with Ace as 4 points and Jack as 1). Every bid in the game carries its own nugget of information, allowing the bidders to decide what level of bid they can expect to reach.

The other skill is of course in the cardplay. Information from the bidding is always probabilistic, and the outcome still hinges on how well the players can read the bids and cards of each other. Another interesting difference is that the winner of the bid (the declarer) will control his partner's hand. The partner (the dummy) opens his cards for all to see and just plays as he is told. This eliminates much of the luck in the actual gameplay, allowing for more logican decision making.

This is why Contract Bridge is called the Chess of card games.

The number of variables to calculate in a competition environment, especially for the unpractised or the beginner is quite daunting. Not to mention that you also have to remember the entire bidding system (or systems). I'm not particularly sure I want to spend my Saturday night lost in thought; and yet the satisfaction of making all the right decisions is really quite euphoric. For anyone with a lot of time on your hands, seeking an intellectual challenge, may I suggest the Singapore Contract Bridge Association as a starting point.

obsessed

I can be quite an obsessive person. To the point of not working. (Other people give up sleep or food, but I could never do that.) My obsessions in the past have included reading, gaming, multiplayer gaming, drinking, clubbing and various sports. (They are in order, so you can practically watch me growing up!)

My latest obsession is board games. Over the last couple of months, I've been introduced to games like Bang!, Settlers of Catan, Carcassonne and Apples to Apples, just to name the ones I really like. These range from role playing games and resource-management/building games to games with lots of talking and arguing. They test your intelligence, strategy, wit and wittiness; and they do it all in a social context where you can get to know more people. And since we own the games instead of going to places like Settler's Cafe, it doesn't cost much at all. Certainly much less than $14 a glass.

So I spend my weekend nights with random people playing various games. It's good because it doesn't really distract from work. It takes quite some planning to get eight people together, so on weekdays I can pretty much focus on what I need to get done. That was before I discovered Puerto Rico.

Puerto Rico is currently the #1 ranked game in the U.S. It's another resource-management game, but there's quite a bit of complexity so it lends some depth to the strategy. We only played it once, so I kind of got the hang of the rules and gameplay, and figured it was quite fun. And then I was introduced to the online version. That was the beginning of the end.

The online version requires the installation of some simple software to run the applet. The interface is very simple, and reminds me of the simple GUI that BBS games used to have a decade ago. Of course, this is much more intricate, and can be played with others. Playing against the computer, each game lasts about 10 minutes and you can quickly get the hang of the game and begin to understand the necessary strategy. And everytime you lose ... you want to play another game. If you don't know the game, instructions can be found here.

I haven't even tried playing with online opponents yet. I don't dare too. I might even lose sleep over that.

Well, if anyone wants to play Puerto Rico online, let me know. Or if you want to try playing various other types of board games and meet fun people, all are welcome.